Thank you Sensi Boutique  for presenting me with the TMI Award!

The TMI Blog Award honors those blogs that discuss everything in detail and do it well. These bloggers aren’t afraid to discuss their most awkward, embarrassing and intimate experiences with honesty, humor and little to no filter.

Here are the rules

• Thank the person who presented you with the award.
• Link back to the blogger who presented the award to you.
• Share an awkward, embarrassing and intimate story in 250 words or less.
• Copy and paste the blog award on your blog.
• Present the TMI Blog Award to 5 – 10 deserving blogs.
• Let them know they have been chosen by leaving a comment at their blog.

I’m honored, truly, that I have impacted the world of carnal knowledge.  Seriously, I am super thrilled!  And now for your reading pleasure, yet another contribution to the masses…

Tampa, me, drunk…insert cute bartender, Gwen – cute, with long black hair and the knowledge of every popular drink recipe known to man.  Not really, but at least the ones important to me.  I was toasted.  She offered to drive me home after her shift.  We had to turn around halfway because I  left my house key in my car; she was a real trooper.  We made it back to my place from Ybor City and the kiss good night turned into a raucous affair in the front seat of her Isuzu.  The kissing turned into heavy petting, which turned into – how did my pants get down so fast?  She was extremely lithe and it was making me dizzy.  I swear, she went from crouched at my feet pleasuring me to a weird, floating 69 position – she was a lesbian ninja!  I was too drunk to enjoy it.  I had to close my eyes at one point to will myself not to puke.  Cunningly enough, I convinced her to come inside.  We got dressed and went to my front door.  Out of nowhere, my downstairs neighbor: “Ohhh, so that was you two humpin’ in the car.”  Me: “No, no it wasn’t.”  Once inside, I realized there was no denying it – my shirt was on inside out.  To make matters worse, my drunk ass aborted the makeout session, opting to show her my new portfolio headshots instead.  Needless to say, she left confused…never to be heard from again.

Hope you enjoyed that little tidbit!  And now, for my nominations…

Diary of an Angry Stripper

License To Pimp

Tallulah

Not The Donny

In The Land of Sex